#6 – Bacon Bandages
I’d mentioned my crack-pot physician earlier for the Bacon Salt, but let me tell you about another of his stupid lies. Everyone knows that if you have a cut or scrape or anything like that, you can just slap a slice of bacon on it. I mean you use a cold steak for black eyes, so what’s so wrong with using bacon instead of gauze? Well, besides the inevitable bite wounds that show up where the bacon used to be… Well, my Doc says it’s “unhygienic” and just “weird.” What a quack.
Well luckily there was yet another product to get my nagging-nelly of a physician off my back. Bacon Bandages are your replacement for a general band-aid. Not only does it look like a little slice of heaven, but it also helps keep bacteria out of the wound. However, it doesn’t taste or smell like bacon, so I highly suggest using the Air Freshener and Bacon Salt to help in this regard when the sight of bacon on your arm becomes too much to bear.
Where to Buy: McPhee.com